Dating is not an exact science. For this is the reason, it is hard to find textbook answers for people who have challenges in their relationships. There is also the fact that human beings are not configured the same way. What works for one couple may not work for another. However, if you are looking for information on how to get your ex back, read on.
The first thing you should realize is that honesty is a great policy. Once you approach the reconciliation process from the perspective of honesty and sincerity, you will make progress. Below are some strategies for you if you want to get together with your former partner.
Don’t Push It
You know the old saying about absence making the heart grow fonder, right? The problem is this statement may work both ways. Absence might make your ex forget all about you. But you cannot tell what the situation is unless you try to win your ex back. The smart move is to take things slow. Send her an innocent text and if she replies, you can take things further.
Send an Email
So you sent a text message and you got a reply. This might not mean anything but you are not about to throw in the towel just yet. Send an email and make it friendlier than the impersonal text message. You are not rushing into things here. Just tell her about your work (this is always a safe topic) and ask about hers. If she sends a prompt reply, you are making progress.
Make that Call
Now, you have made two opening gambits and so far the signs are good so it is time to stick out your neck a bit. If you still have her number, call her. And even if you do not have the number, procure it from a mutual friend. Call her and discuss safe topics for a few minutes (the weather, her favorite soccer club and a movie you know she adores. Just before you end the call, tell her it has been a pleasure hearing her voice and that you would love to see her again. She might be non-committal at first but she will eventually agree to a meeting in a “neutral location”. Now, don’t go congratulating yourself just yet. A meeting in a neutral location is not the same thing as an ironclad agreement that you will get back together again.
Be Tactful but Sincere
This meeting is a huge test and an opportunity so you should not blow it. Be tactful; be honest but the sincere as well. Tell her you miss her and you want to get back together again. She might not give you a categorical answer at this meeting but that is perfectly understandable. Give her time and schedule another meeting. Now, the ice is melting and from her body language, it is clear that is interesting but you know how it is. A woman will always be a woman. She wants you to persuade her to come back you so do a great job of it.
Do not Reopen Old Wounds
Sometimes, the best word is the one that is not said. You are a dignified and responsible dude so you should watch what you say to your ex and now would-be lady. Do not reopen old wounds and do not play the blame game. If you are to blame for the hitch in the relationship, take the blame in a dignified manner. If the lady is the one at fault and she has now owned up, do not push it. The present and the future are more important than the past.
Don’t Compare Notes
You have been apart for a while and in that time; so much water has passed under the bridge. Do not give her your dating biography and do not ask for hers. Even if she asks you casually about other women that took her place in the interim just give her an enigmatic smile and tell her “nobody important”.
Establish New Parameters
Maybe your relationship collapsed because you were not ready to commit to a more permanent arrangement. Maybe you were overbearing and jealous and your lady felt she needed more space. Whatever the problem was at the time, iron it out and establish new parameters for the relationship now.
You had a great relationship once and you drifted apart. Now, you are back together again. Hopefully, you have learned some valuable lessons. Put these lessons to practice and make the relationship work, click here for more.